Breaking Story: Britney Gives Birth to Bat Child

brit3_d
Originally uploaded by superherockstar.

Oh Britney, Way to go! You did it, you managed to guarantee your spot in the public eye for months, probably years to come! Get ready people, this is going to be the longest pregnancy ever! You thought Kate Hudson or Liv Tyler were preggors forever, well you just wait cause America's gonna go Lamaze crazy for Brit!!

Britney Spears was already like a car crash, no one really likes or respects her or even truly cares about what she's doing, but we can't look away. We want to be disgusted so we can turn our heads and be like "oohh..gross, did you see that?" And with this pregnancy thing, it's like the crash site exploded and now dead people debris is on our windshield, slamming up against the door, Oh God, some bloody hair is caught in the wipers, Lord Have Mercy!! How are we supposed to look away now that this hot mess (that's right) is about to spew forth some sort of creature. (I use the word creature because there is no scientific fact proving that K-Fed is in fact a human being).

I wonder what the Kabalah has to say about stupid whores getting pregnant by dirty rednecks??