Jessica Simpson Gives Birth to Bat Child; Nick's Shocking Secret

Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey have given birth, collectively, to a bat baby early Tuesday morning. The child is part bat making either Nick or Jessica a larger percentage of bat. Most likely Nick is to blame for the bad genes, it seems his partying all night with strippers was just too much for Jessica and she most likely put a curse on him making him a bat. Their publicists are still working out the details on exactly what will be done with this freak of nature, but one things for certain, they will definitly lie about it. Other sources also have stated they plan to lie about it, and Jessica and Nick say they will do everything they can to help come up with some good lies. And Nick had sex with a tranny.