New Study Shows Hicks Drive Pick-Up Trucks

A startling discovery Monday reveals that people whom drive pick-up trucks are less likely the use their seatbelts because they are drunken inbred hicks. They are also less likely to bathe and be literate. I for one am shocked! I always though thought people in the red states were super smart and made responsible logical decisions and that's why they voted for Bush. Turns out hey are reckless drunken idiots that think they are too good for these new-fangled "seatbeats" that all those fat cats in Washington (Bush excluded of coarse) want them to wear. I guess they think God is going to protect them as they are flung through the windshield onto the pavement at 60 miles an hour. To be fair though, God did protect me from that once, but we were doing it.