Miss me? I know that drunk, Jordan, did. Just look at her! ..that drunk...

This is prolly my favorite story ever. Jordan's husband Peter Andre [of unknown celebrity origin ...perhaps some UK Big Brother? They love that shit over there, WTF is Big Brother anyway? ...besides wack] ..so Jordan's husband wrote some tell all book calling Jordan a mean drunk and alcholic and that she is like abusive and stuff. Which #1, he is like 350lbs of solid muscle why is he being such a pussy about, like "boo hoo, my wife hits me", you would think he would be angry from all the 'roids and that she'd cower in fear every time he entered the room. And #2 they were still happily married when he wrote this book. I mean Peter, give her a reason to drink why don't cha! You should have some spirits waiting for her when you get home, like some expensive champagne that you can buy with the money you made from selling out your wife you ruthless bastard.