The Pure Prattle Expository Bulletin

TV

New Six Feet Under episodes begin Monday; let us all rejoice. But alas it is the final season; let us all unjoice.

The New Real World is about to start and I can't wait to watch a marathon months later out of lazy desperation. This will be a perfect primer for the cast-mate's inevitable appearances on the RWRR Challenege. Will they be Shavondas or Tonyas? Hopefully not an Ace...another Brad would be nice...

Da Ali G Show, despite being really obvious can actually be clever and funny. Here's a classic moment:
the scene is a table full of drug paraphernalia
ALI: "So all these drugs are addictive and illegal? Then how come Pringles are legal, even they admit, 'once you pop, you can't stop.'"

Beauty and the Geek is a long time coming, finally there is a show for the whole family. This one is a must see, I'm not even sure how to describe it...captivating maybe.

STRIPSEARCH!!! I gar-un-tee I will watch every repeat of this show that is ever aired. And masturbate.

Kept: "Do you want to be Kept? Come live in the lap of luxury." That's all I can think about: Jerry's voiceovers. 'Tis a descent show though.

Celebs

Jessica Simpson has allegedly "f-ed" both Johnny Knoxville and Bam Margera to which I say a respective "Yah" and "Nay." Bam's bitter ex-girlfriend spilled all the beans on a radio show and confirmed earlier reports from Bam's dad that Jessica is a tart. She also said Jessica is "as stupid as she looks," which is fine just so long as she's not "as hot as she looks," cause then she would have third-degree burns all over that smooth toned body of hers.

Jessica Alba wore a dress to the Mtv Movie Awards that was see-through and her absolutely perfect and beautiful breasts were reveled, including a nipple sculpted by the Lord above.

X-Tina goes shopping for video games cause she's the coolest, way to go X-tina!

Cameron Diaz did not kiss that guy and she is pissed! Consequently, she is suing the National Enquirer, because it is high time people knew that magazine embellishes its stories and stop trusting it as the Nation's finest news source.

Angelina Jolie was voted the most beautiful woman in the World, the WORLD people!! (#4 on the list: Sofia Coppola. What?) Poor poor Jennifer Aniston, that has really gotta hurt. If she was ever worried that Angelina was prettier than her, she may worry no more.