The Most Important Updates Ever!

Everyone have a good weekend? That's nice. I went down to a little place called Charlottesville, VA and let me tell you that is one classy joint. No joke, they had some really nice bars and apparently real people, not just students, live there too. Too bad the roads there on are meth though.

• There is this posting on thesuperficial.com thats says "among the celebs...[list of hot celebs]...and Rocco DiSpirito from the Food Network." Nice try Food Network, but you guy will never be celebrities and the fact that you have to say you're from the Food Network is a perfect example why.


• Jennifer Aniston, starved for attention or just starved? either way she "collapsed", apparently she's a folding chair.


• The Lohan continues to tell young girls that they can look emaciated through healthy eating and excersize. Ya know I could make a coke joke here, but I'm not gonna.


• Madonna got help writing her books? Nuh unh, I thought stars did everything themselves.


• CNN.com is running this story: Cell phone service disabled in New York tunnels. They get cell phone service in tunnels!! That's unfair, I barely get service in my apartment.


• Former Mtv "VJ", Kennedy, gave birth to a baby boy, who came out quipping.


• Billy Bob Thorton plays drunk loser on the silver screen once again, this time coaching an underdog team that beats all odds, etc. I see they didn't take my advice and go with Nicole Riche.


• Bum-ba-da-dum GAY RUMOR OF THE DAY!!!! Hayden Christensen, member dis?


• The ever-so-lovely X-tina is in trouble. She was attacked or some nonsense and we as a society have the responsibility to find that person and punish them. Honestly, if something were to happen to her I don't know what I'd do. Check out this hot pic and more (from thesuperficial once again), and try to find the half full flute of champagne in the corner on the floor, as if an enamored socialite left it and dashed away to make love at once.