CNN.com Headlines

• Robotic patients help train doctors - What?! Patients training doctors, that doesn't seem like a good idea, shouldn't doctors have professional instructors, plus they're robots for crying out loud!


• Group: Millions not getting food stamps - Has anyone ever seen a foodstamp? Are they like a regular stamp? And if so, how is something so tiny supposed to fill you up? I understand poor people have to eat paper, that makes sense, but at least give them a whole sheet of looseleaf or something.


• From honky-tonk to highbrow - This is proabably the best headline I've read, I don't know what it's in reference to though? Probably greatness.


• Train hits car at crossing, killing two - That's funny.


• Born without legs, still playing football - Are you kidding me? Is this a joke? Why couldn't that guy play something a little more reasonable, like Mahjong.


• The fantasy author rock star - There are WAY to many adjectives in this title. Also makes no sense.


• Police: Dad locked in basement - Good idea, next time I don't get what I want, it's the basement for you pops.


• Ask Jeeves to drop butler mascot - NOO!! I love referring to Jeeves as a real person, my Niagerian co-worker is always answering my questions with: "I doughnt know why dont we ashk cheeves."


• Computer worm suspect in court - What are they gonna do, talk to it? Do they think it's a real worm? Cause worms can't talk either. Boy these people are dumb.