Jessica Simpson: Not a Whore Allegedly
So I guess Bam Margera did NOT bang the shit out of little Jessica and neither did Johnny "so fucking hot" Knoxville. It even seems that Bam's ex-girlf might not even be his ex-girlf and Bam and her actually cooked this thing up together so they could sell their story to the tabloids. Good idea Bam! This way no female celebs will ever trust you and you'll prolly get sued by the ever-pissy father Simpson. If I were Jessica I would be so mad, I'd probably fill his house with foam or build a moat around it or something. Then me and my dirty friends would prolly pee on something and throw it at each other.
Side Note: Why is Johnny Knoxville such the man? Is it cause he is the least stupid of his friends? Is it those eyes and those lips? Actually, it's probably the shades.
posted by --Robert-Campbell-- @ 9:09 AM
1 comments
1 Comments:
Duh, didn't you know Johnny Knoxville keeps all of his handsome superpowers in his black leather jacket? Think about it.....those red, white, and blue stripes down the sleeves? We're not talking about Captain America, here, so why does a mere civilian require such magical / mutated / atomic / patriotic / all-around-awsome / body-armor...?
The answer is simple....he found the jacket in a neon-green ooze of genetically mutating nuclear waste... youknow.....down by the nuclear waste facility? Next to the skate parK?
Eat shit, Bam.
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