Paris & Nicole's Vaginas to Get Own Show

Even more popular than trust-fund Barbie, Paris Hilton, and malnourished tart, Nicole Riche, are their vaginas obviously. And now Fox is going to make sure those two famous ginas do a show together. Fox says even if the genitals don't get along they still are under contract and must swap juices, or at least be on the same show. They might do a wedding prep reality show (cause no one's ever done that before) and this way the privates don't even need to be filmed together and/or spread a yeast infection. Alright, that's it, I'm done talking about the vagina... tampons!!!.... okay now I'm done.

And in other news... about genitals...

• Bo Bice says he is soooo glad he didn't win American Idol, he and Paris decided fame is lame anyways. Plus this will give him more time to sit at home all day watching judge shows n' jerkin' it.


• Mariah Carey was belting out one of her "hits" when her ginormous breatases popped right out her top! Too bad this happened in Germany or something where TiVo hasn't been invented yet.


• Jared Leto apparently has a big cock... and let me see... nope, still just a whiny, ego-maniac, "rocker" douche, not attractive.


• I got my genitals pimped, thank you Mtv!!


• Kisten Dunst has crabs, or at least that's what I'm telling Jake. She needs to back up off my man or I'm gonna mess her up.